Weeds on the path of friendship – a lesson of loss and love.

So you may cross their path, and you will love them, and though they will love you back some obstacle will fall in the path of friendship, be it fear, or chaos, or indifference, and if that obstacle is too hard to climb over, or fight through, they will go and you will let them.


They will give up, and may disappear. And you will let them. You will let them because you love them, and for that it is better just to know they are happy elsewhere than to watch them struggle through the difficulty of overcoming an obstacle, simply to keep open the path to you.


Then, if you should meet years later, if you should find another path, obstacle free and in need of a mere trimming of overgrowth, and the fires ignite again, and lost love is remembered, do not fret if once again you are forgotten. Although it may break your heart, the path that once seemed so easy to walk, may have grown longer throughout the lost years, the trees may have grown, darkening the way, making it easy to misstep. But if once again you lose sight of them do not grieve, for you are never really forgotten.


They may forget your smile, and they may forget your name eventually, but you will join the grey faces that make up the bleachers of their memory, shaping future loves and friendships, whilst those around them, in striking colour on the playing field, will silently thankyou, not even knowing who you are, for being a stepping stone to their dear one’s learning how to love. You will stay a part of their heart, nameless, perhaps faceless, but there, because you taught them how to love.


And you will be okay with this, because you will realise perhaps, that you learnt something from them too. 


~ by Alissa Anderton on May 4, 2010.

3 Responses to “Weeds on the path of friendship – a lesson of loss and love.”

  1. This is very true Lis, many are the paths in my life overgrown, but new ones are cut each day, some are just deeper than others 🙂

  2. No offense, but I find it interesting how you mention their struglle against obstacles, and how they may give up. Implied by what you have written, you would just stand there and watch their attempts. Never forging forward to help, just letting them go…….

    • No offense taken. It was a while ago I wrote this, and it strikes me that it would be brought to my attention again now, in a time that I perhaps need to harken to my own advice.

      My question to you would be “How far should you go to keep them close, when people are at risk of being hurt?”

      The point is that old cliche “it takes two”. You can help them as much as you can, but if they think the obstacle is just to much, and they refuse to do their part, there is only so far you can chase them or try to convince them of otherwise, and no matter how much you love them, there comes a point where, if they just can not make their way over it, you have to stop trying or risk hurting them. And if you really loved them enough, you’d take the pain of losing them over the possibility of their being hurt.

      Sometimes, if you’ve tried everything you can, and someone wants to give up on you, you just have to let them.

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