Wouldn’t you want to dance in a gorilla suit…

So the whole bucket list thing has died down recently… 

But remember when it was big? Remember that huge craze that swept the world and everyone was making these crazy lists of things that they would do if they could?

Well, at the time I hated it (I pretended to hate it) and I refused to make a list (I pretended to refuse to make a list) and unbeknownst to anyone (including me) I made a list… because a friend asked me what I wanted to do with my life… and I just found it. 

This was the list I sent my friend… 

Spend some time in a third world country. 
Learn how to ride my motorcycle
Get a book or two published. 
Get a bachelor in arts – Majoring in English Language and Linguistics and perhaps Mastering in Mythology (have some little letters after my name) 
own a bookstore… 
Create a painting that rivals the Cistene Chapel
Learn how to say “reciprocity” properly
spend a week all alone in the middle of nowhere with no one to talk to, no internet and no phone. 
dress up as a gorilla and dance on a table. 
turn as many strangers into friends as I can
See my children realise their dreams. 
dance in the corridors of the Louvre
meet a ghost (a friendly one I suppose….)
give blood
be out in the middle of the ocean, far enough out that I can not see any land on any side. 
face some kind of test like the Eliminator on Gladiator…
Develop the ability to read peoples minds, even for an hour… 
Or if that doesn’t happen… a magical ability to sense when people are lying to me… 
learn how to work copper into rings and jewellery
learn how to blow glass…
make a renaissance style fairy dress and wear it out one day just to float down the sidewalk
Fly… without any mechanical devices keeping me up there. 
spend a day lying in a forest just looking up into the treetops at the green sunlight that sparkles through. 
own a python
stand atop a luminous billboard, a la superhero style and stare at the city below me. 
jump from a bridge onto a moving semi and survive
spend a night in a cemetery
get a tattoo up my neck under my hair (I realise I would need to shave my hair for this)
memorise  every word to Shakespeares ,ROmeo and Juliet
Own an investment property
be swept up in a hurricane like dorothy was and land somewhere awesome. 
spend a day in someone elses shoes. 
Spend one christmas eve in the southport homeless shelter… perhaps helping in the kitchen, but mainly just to talk to the people there… and listen to their stories. 
adopt a grandmother (not that the one’s we have aren’t awesome…)
learn how to dance like Fred Astaire (he just looks so free and happy when he’s doing that sideways twirl in the air)
run as fast as a cheetah.
get some awesome professional photos of me… so that when I’m old and wrinkly I can say to my grandkids… “hey guess who this hottie is!!”
buy escargot from a little street vendor in france….
gain a reputation for nonsense and be known as “Madam Freaky Freaky Lady”
be really properly understood
be bodypainted all over so it looks like I’m covered in eagle feathers. 
spend an entire day not talking at all… just listening.
learn how to use Garageband on my mac. 
Learn how to speak yiddish (or latin)
have a bath in chocolate custard
stick rhinestones all over my face
make a room in our house into a library with a brown leather wingbacked chair, a chandelier, velvet drapes and black wall paper. 
set a million butterflies free into the air. 
learn to cook authentic indian curries.
Win the lottery
have a successful garden. 
learn to play ” I believe you liar” (washington) on the piano.
Create a cartoon character who will take over the world “Twilight” style and use it as my highway to global domination…bwaaahaaa

This was it… my bucket list. But I wouldn’t call it a bucket list, because it was a craze. It was popular and I had no intention of being any part of it. 


But I did.


And I was.


And now I am coming out to say this is what I did… judge me if you like. 


Does anyone else have a bucket list that wont come true??



~ by Alissa Anderton on March 6, 2013.

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